38 weeks: We’re ready.
Every moment of every day I am distracted by the thought, no the hope, that labor is around the corner. I am ready, PB is ready, the house is ready. Now we are just waiting on bambino.
Bambino, your mamma and baba love you so much and are ready to meet you. Time to come out and play!
38 week belly pic:
*Previous belly pics here
Here is what Babycenter says about my little watermelon:
Your baby has really plumped up. She weighs about 6.8 pounds and she’s over 19 1/2 inches long (like a leek). She has a firm grasp, which you’ll soon be able to test when you hold her hand for the first time! Her organs have matured and are ready for life outside the womb.
Wondering what color your baby’s eyes will be? You may not be able to tell right away. If she’s born with brown eyes, they’ll likely stay brown. If she’s born with steel gray or dark blue eyes, they may stay gray or blue or turn green, hazel, or brown by the time she’s 9 months old. That’s because a child’s irises (the colored part of the eye) may gain more pigment in the months after she’s born, but they usually won’t get “lighter” or more blue. (Green, hazel, and brown eyes have more pigment than gray or blue eyes.)
This week my dad came one a surprise visit from RI for my birthday. It was a really special day and night that I will never forget- my last one before becoming a mom. I am feeling pretty emotional about everything this week. All along I’ve talked about how I wish I could ask my mom stuff about her pregnancy and my brother and I as newborns. My dad gave me a great gift by remembering that my mom went early with both my brother and I (and that is why he was not back in the country yet). It is a little piece of information I never thought I’d be able to learn.
October 16th will mark the 10 year anniversary of my mom’s passing. It is just so strange to think that I will become a mom almost exactly ten years after saying goodbye to my own mom. All of the September 11th coverage brought back some very powerful memories of those last few weeks with my mom in home hospice, and I can’t help but feel sorry for myself. I try to be as strong as I can, but she will always be missing from my life and there is nothing I can do about that. Somehow writing it here makes me feel a little less alone about it.
One memory that came back to me was that of the hospice worker handing me a packet of paper’s outside my parents’ house. The top page read “the 5 stages of grief.” At the time I hadn’t even realized my mom was not going to eventually get better. As this memory seeped its way to the foreground of my brain I realized how ironic it is that the feelings I’m going through now mimic the stages of grief. I call them the 5 stages of waiting for labor.
I’ve had a few signs of labor, but nothing too special. This might be TMI for some of you, but at my appointment last week I had found out I’ve begun dilating and effacing. Maybe the walks are working? Right now I am at this week’s appointment and I hope to have made even more good progress. I have been walking as much as possible and bouncing on my exercise ball when my back hurts. I’m feeling fairly restless and both make me feel like I have some control.
One important thought to mention… While I really don’t want an epidural or any pain medication, I am not completely against it. The most important thing for me is to avoid a c-section. Also, I don’t want pain medication just because that is what everyone does. Any intervention I encounter should have a purpose that makes sense to me. If I need an epidural because labor is stalling for several (I mean several) hours and everyone agrees it would help me relax and progress better, then that is something I will consider. My ultimate goal is easy: avoid c-section. I am keeping an open mind about it all.
PB has been spoiling me. The other day he bought a mini watermelon and served me some in the watermelon itself! It was so sweet and so tasty. We can’t wait to be able to say “IT’S TIME TO GO!” Until that day comes he has been taking care of me in the greatest of ways.
My MIL came over yesterday and we had fun making cheese boreg. We made individual triangles that look gorgeous and I can’t wait to try them. I know they will taste good this time. I am forgoing the other freezer meals I was going to make. I realize that I just prefer fresh food too much and would rather eat a quick broiled chicken + steamed broccoli dinner over something from the freezer.
I’m not working that much anymore. I am trying to at least keep up with my emails, but I just feel so uncomfortable all day long. I don’t feel like talking either. I keep sending phone calls from people I love to voicemail because I just don’t have the energy. I feel bad but I also don’t. I am doing what I need to do.
After being unsure about a diaper bag for months I finally found one I love. PB and my dad treated me to the bag + wallet. I will use my Lululemon bag for every day diaper bag use and the Burberry one for church and other social functions. I’m in love with it!
Random facts of the week:
Overall weight gained: 37/38 lbs, with a gain of about 0.5 lbs in the last week
Stretch mark situation: not looking good. Luckily they are all below my belly button or on my hips. I can’t wait for them to fade since they look so angry right now.
Current cravings: I am feeling hungry a lot, but nothing really sounds good. Much like the beginning of the pregnancy I want simple flavors.
Current symptoms: difficulty sleeping, lots of trips to the bagno, sciatic nerve pain, cramping and lower back pain, excitement, anxiety, nesting like crazy
Stranger stuff: When we ran errands this weekend lots of people made comments on the bump. Most notable were the two ladies in Bed, Bath & Beyond who just HAD to know when I was due. When I told them the one woman said “damnnnn girl, I thought so because you are BIG!” She then asked if it was all baby. I said it was baby + ice cream. I crack myself up.
Labor dreams: 1. I heard a pop like a champagne cork popping and thought my water broke. When I woke up I realized it was just thunder.
Bambino kicks: strong but more like rolls. He is running out of room and tries to roll his way into more comfy positions. It is the one thing I will absolutely miss about being pregnant.
Oh and PS? I am now officially past the day I thought I’d have the baby.. which was yesterday.
**Belly pics here