PhillyBaby
Our Wedding
Blogs I Love
Night 1 in the Big Boy Bed
**Update 9/3/2013: We gave up on the big boy bed and Raffi is back in the crib. I’m actually thrilled because this was the one thing I never wanted to rush. In fact I’d love for him to stay in the crib until 3 if at all possible. We will see. For now the crib is working again and that’s all that I need to know. Thank you for all of your tips!***
This is the first time since Raffi was born that I have a lump in my throat over a milestone. Actually, I might have been upset the last time I nursed him, but nothing like the way this feels. Tonight, at 23 months old, is Raffi’s first night in a big boy bed. Insert dramatic tears.
I have definitely pushed Raffi to be a big boy with so many things. I introduced finger foods early in the form of baby led weaning, stopped swaddling at 3 months old exactly, nursed for just a year despite him still being interested, and potty trained at 19.5 months old. With most of these things I just followed Raffi’s lead, and the big boy bed is no exception.
For the background on why we even considered this now read my latest Babycenter post: Help! Is my son ready for a bed?
So with another bad night of crying under our belts we decided to let Raffi have his big boy bed. He was as clear as a 2 year old can be with his desire to “lay in a bed” and “sleep in a bed” and “sleep under the covers” and “have lots of pillows” – those are all phrases he’s repeated over and over again at bedtime over the last few weeks. After discussing where the guest bed would go, Trig and I just decided to move it right then and go for it. Trig took the legs off the guest bed and put it against a long wall in his room. We also piled pillows around the floor just in case he falls off.
It’s 9:30 PM and after multiple tries he is finally asleep in his bed. I think he got out of bed and banged on the door crying maybe 5 times with me going in each time and putting him back in bed. Each time I laid next to him in bed for a few minutes. Finally I sat by the door inside the room and told him to lay down and go to sleep. I chatted with him about all the fun things we did this weekend until I finally trailed off and hoped he was asleep. It worked and now we have to wait and see how the rest of the night goes. At one point we had decided to give up and I asked him if he wanted his crib. He said yes but when I tried to put him in he flipped out and started yelling for his bed.
I hate that he’s out of baby jail. I hate that he’s growing up. And I hate that I don’t know if the rest of the night is going to go well or not. I’m scared.
What was your big kid bed experience? At what age did your kids transition? Any tips on bedtime? I have a feeling I will have to stay with him until he’s asleep until he gets used to this, something I’ve rarely had to do before.
13 Responses to “Night 1 in the Big Boy Bed”
Comments
Read below or add a comment...
We just converted Bronwen’s bed yesterday too! She sleeps on a cot at daycare and a queen bed at my moms so she was more than ready. I had to stay with her last night too and Chris is giving a go at it tonight. Not sure if it will help with the nighttime tears for good, but here’s hoping!
I’m working on the same post for later this week! As I mentioned already, we moved Sam to a big boy bed because he had learned to climb out of his crib. Nights 1 and 2 were pretty rough (naptimes, too). It took about 2 hours to get him to sleep, and he was awake one night from 2am – 5am. But … night #3 was a success! He still likes to climb out of bed once or twice before he falls asleep. He opens the door (which has a safety gate at it) and talks to himself for a bit. But then he crawls back into bed. Although it’s very, very hard, I don’t go upstairs unless he cries for more than 5 minutes. And I have not laid in bed with him (except to read books before turning out the light) since night #2. It also helped to insert a foam bumper on inside and outside of his full-size bed to make it feel smaller and more comfortable. He loves to sleep with pillows and a blanket and all of his stuffed animals, too. I’m sure Raffi will adjust in no time! Good luck!
So if he gets out of bed you don’t go in? I wasn’t sure how to handle that. Also, do you have a nightlight or is your room dark? His room has been pitch black so he can sleep later in the morning (otherwise he wakes at sunrise) but I wonder if he will be scared falling asleep in the dark in a big bed.
I’m all choked up over big-kid milestones, too, lately! H is still is her crib and never tries to climb out or show any resistance towards it. EVentually I know we will need to switch her, but she likes habits and routine, so I don’t look forward to it. We will probably move her into a new room with a new bed and I hope to let her ‘big girl’ room decorations so she loves it all.
We’re still a while away from it, but I look forward to hearing more about R’s next week. It actually sounds like he will take to it well! Good luck!
To be honest, I’m not sure how much my comments will help because our transition was relatively easy, I think I was putting it off because I was nervous about how it would go. In our preparation for the twins, we knew we needed to switch her soon, so that she was used to her new room prior to their arrival. Adam put her new toddler bed together when it arrived and since it was up and ready to go we sort of just dove in that very next night. I’ll admit I was hesitant and nervous, but Kheri was so excited about that new bed that we really had no issue. Now we did get her a standard “toddler bed” so it is really the same size as her crib was and not high off the ground at all. The first few nights we would check on her quite frequently and we did find her asleep out of the bed on the floor a couple of times, but she never woke up. Since that first week, she has stayed in her bed no problem and won’t even come out of the room in the morning, rather she calls for us like she used to in her crib. We did put a baby gate for the first week at the top of the stairs on the off chance she did come out of her room and we didn’t hear her right away, but so far she hasn’t (I’m sure that will change ;). The biggest issue we have had is she likes to talk the 900 animals that now need to go to bed with her and she doesn’t always go to sleep right away, but not a huge issue 🙂 So again, I’m not really much help because I think the transition has been way harder on me than it was on her, which is why I held off. But too be honest, seeing how excited she is about that new bed, made the sadness of her getting to be a “big girl” that much easier!
We still have to sit in our son’s room until he falls asleep and he’s four. It is ridiculous, but my husband is not on board changing it. However, I recently read an article on sleep habits in children and it said 50 percent of parents do the same at that age. So don’t feel bad if you have to stay in there for awhile!
Our son is 21 months old and we converted him to the big boy bed last month. He likes it so much better than the crib. The transition took two nights.
what did you do to make the transition smooth?
We agreed on a plan ahead of time. We wrote down what we would do and we stuck to it with extreme rigidity. For us, that involved hanging out where he couldn’t see us in the room (we took turns). Every time he sat up, we gently placed him back down on the bed, with no talking, no reaction, no facial expression. We called it Mannequin Mom and Deadfaced Dad. There was some crying, and we didn’t get much sleep those first two nights, but it was worth it.
I’m pretty sure that whatever method you choose will work as long as you and your partner stick to it.
I am cracking up at mannequin mom and deadfaced dad. Last night was a big fail. He fell asleep in bed with no tears or anything after two attempted escapes but then at 5 in the morning was freaking out. He also woke up at 2 to use the bathroom and I laid down with him when he went to fall back asleep. At the 5 am wakeup We put him in the crib and he slept until 8:30 AM! That is way later than usual. I would like him to sleep in his crib still but he had been refusing it so I’m curious to see how it goes at naptime today.
Hey Sabrina!
Few suggestions that worked for our two year old:
Be consistent in whatever you do. If you do something different each time, they get confused.
I was weary to let her cry it out bc I’ve never done it before but with my friends convincing and some google searching, I did it and it took two days for her to stay in bed and she never gets out until I go get her in morning (it’s been 8 months so far).
The method we followed was to put her in the bed with normal routine (brush teeth, read book, lullaby, tuck in etc) then told her you need to stay in bed and no getting out and turn around and walk out and close door. Then I’d watch from monitor, the second she was at foot of bed about to climb out, I would walk in and not make eye contact or cuddle, just lay her back in bed and lovingly but firmly say its time to sleep, stay in bed. This could go on for over and hour at naptime or bedtime. And she cried and screamed and my heart broke… I was skeptical whether it would work but it really did. It took two days. Patience and support from spouse/ friends are key…
Also, if you don’t want a nightlight, those light up ladybugs are great. Both my kids have it. They light up the ceiling with stars and turn off after I think 20mins.
Good luck!!!!
Wow, after reading these it seems like we got off incredibly easy. We moved the full size bed into our son’s room one day when he was 2.5, and then stuck to the same routine that night…pj’s, brush teeth, stories, tuck in, immediately leave room. He goes to sleep on his own and almost never wakes up in the middle of the night. In the morning, he will stay in bed and call for me to come get him. In daycare he learned never to get off his cot during naptime until allowed, and he does the same at home. So far, no need for a baby gate, lock on the door, etc..
I’ve tried not to start habits that would be hard to break (rocking to sleep, staying in the room, etc.). It’s been fairly sucessful with our bedtime routines.
http://www.cafepoa.com
Description:
Cafe POA delivers Simple Menu App for Restaurants, Hotels and Food stores.
Simple integration with Social Media, existing POS e.g. Aloha as well as
Payment Systems to increase sales, improve quality,
enhance customer engagement and increase revenue.